Quotes from Tales of the Cocktail 2010

30
Jul/10
3

Last year I pretended that I was going to make my way through my notes and post a summary of every seminar I attended. I failed completely at that. I’m not going to pretend this year: instead, I’m just going to transcribe, with attribution, the humorous quotations from notable bartenders I jotted down. Given the blog, never mind traditional media, coverage of the event at this point, I feel this is my niche. So, here we go:

“The dry gin martini is the shortest distance between two points.” – Dave Wondrich

“If you can’t look cool stirring, your drink won’t have any deliciousness.” – Thomas Waugh

“… as long as that shit ice is consistently shit.” – Dave Arnold

“Never trust a skinny chef or a sober bartender.” – Danny Valdez

“You should have your own rockstar in mind [when tending bar].” – Dushan Zaric

“The government is not in the liquor or wine business.” – France, when asked by the US to police St. Pierre et Michelon during Prohibition [Somebody needs to tell the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania about that...]

“Martinis are like women’s breasts: they should be round and smooth. One is too few, three is too many.” – Henrik Hammer, Geranium Gin

“We’ve got a Dutchman, a South African, and a Dane: if we were any more laid back, we’d be horizontal.” – Andrew Nichols, of door74, presenting with Henrik Hammer and Timo Janse

Comments (3) Trackbacks (0)
  1. Henrik Hammer
    11:56 pm on July 31st, 2010

    Thanks for listing all these cool quotations :o)

    And the honour for my recital about the Martini and the bussoms must be forwarded to Mr. Stepen Bayley from his book called “Gin”.

    Cheers,
    Henrik

  2. gr
    12:13 am on August 1st, 2010

    Henrik, I just calls ‘em like I hears ‘em, but you’re a good man for passing the laurels. :^>

    Given my work schedule, I’ve yet to be in Philadelphia for more than 3 hours (04:30 Tuesday arrival by car, 07:30 departure by plane) since we spoke beside the Monteleone pool, but I’ll definitely be in touch via email about a potential Philly training with Geranium and to put you in touch with Rob and Meredith of Philadelphia Distilling (http://www.philadelphiadistilling.com/ ).

    (I’ll be home again for nearly 18 hours this Monday, US Eastern time, much of which time will be devoted to laundry, then in LA 3 – 8 August, but I expect to be able to catch up on some of this during that period.)

  3. Henrik Hammer
    5:40 am on August 1st, 2010

    Sounds like a pretty tough schedule, Gabriel. I’m going to Spain 3 – 8 August my self so let’s catch up the following week. I’d really appreciate if I could get some hints re. distribution, and be able to go and do some stuff with you and your colleagues in Philly.

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